The Season of Renewal

renewגמר חתימה טובה

Having just experienced another spiritually uplifting and inspirational Rosh Hashana, and preparing for a meaningful, soul-introspective Yom Kippur, let us reflect on the “call of the moment” and how it applies for the coming year.

The central theme of Tishrei is “RENEWAL“. It begins with Rosh Hashana, with the word SHANA (שנה) coming from the etymological root word SHINUI (שינוי) – CHANGE. It’s a time when we take stock of the past year’s happenings and our actions (or lack of) and make positive adjustments and resolutions for the upcoming year.

Shabbos Shuva we read Parshas Vayeilech where Moshe Rabbeinu leaves us with the final two mitzvos – HAKHEL and WRITING A SEFER TORAH – that will forge the future of the Jewish people for generations to come, up until this very day. The mitzvah of HAKHEL is gathering the Jewish People during Succos following the shemittah year. It is essentially the national covenant renewal ceremony ensuring that the nation would regularly rededicate itself to the Love and Fear of Hashem. It wasn’t good enough to rely on any commitments made in the past. The writing of a Sefer Torah incumbent on every single person is likewise an expression of personal renewal, taking ownership and personal responsibility to that which binds us with Hashem.

On Yom Kippur we are told that that the Kohen Gadol must store away the linen clothes used and never to be worn again. Once again symbolizing the need to detach and be liberated from the limitations and mundane of the past. We need to set aside our “old clothes” and be re-energized and  enthused by donning “new” garments (physical and spiritual – thought, speech and behavior).

Succos we escape our comfort zone by leaving our homes and dwelling in an outdoor temporary abode where we are exposed to the natural elements. We are confronted with new and challenging conditions that “wake us up” and hone our survival and living skills. Like a breath of fresh air, we become invigorated and rejuvenated when we return indoors.

Simchas Torah we let loose with a few le’chaims and lively dancing until we reach the level  where our simcha breaks through all barriers (שמחה פורץ גדר).

Don’t allow the past to control you. We need to break out of any rut or stale attitudes that have been adopted. We cannot just continue with the SAME OLD SAME OLD. As the saying goes, ” if you go on doing what you’ve always done, you will go on getting what you’ve always gotten”.


1] Out with the old. In with the new. If it aint working, change direction. Don’t become drained and dispirited. Focus – is the same. To get married or enhance marriage, the “HOW” may need tinkering.

2] Are you in a good place? In a good state of mind? Are you eating healthy? Working out? Taking vacations; even if they are only for the weekend? Dating doesn’t mean all else comes to a halt. Live an energized, uplifting life.

3] Stop feeling victimized. Eradicate any past injustices or situations that drag you into constant misery. Unburden yourself. You’ll feel much lighter. Don’t be bitter. Don’t resent. Walk with your head up high and with an extra spring to your step. BE POSITIVE!!!! ”   – טראכט גוט וועט זיין גוט

4] Express gratitude. Be thankful and appreciative. Let your newfound vibe have a ripple affect on your surroundings.

5] Mingle with a new crowd of friends. See new faces. Make new connections. have different conversations. Doors of opportunity are waiting to be opened. Just come knocking.

6] Time to reconnect with Hashem. (This really should be the 1st Step.)

7] In a number of responsa from the Lubavitcher Rebbe, one is advised to take on a special mitzvah or action with the intent for the “appropriate shidduch in the right time”. Tzedakah, tehillim, chitas, davening, mikvah, chesed, assisting another chosson and kallah (financially and/or giving a helping hand)…..the list is endless. COLlive just posted an article how the Rebbe blessed 3 bochurim, with shidduchim that year, for assisting the Chabad shaliach in Worcester MA for Simchas Torah back in 1966.

8] Need help with all the above? Consult your mashpia. Consult a mentor who understands specifically dating and marriage. Consult someone who can address any fears, anxieties and hesitancies holding you back. Get your ducks in order so you are ready to date, commit and marry.

YES – I do know someone who can help you with all of the above. GIVE ME A CALL!!!!!  😎 

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